Today, I turn 40. Behind the scenes, I’m taking an intentional day to myself (no computer or phone) to celebrate the massive decade that is behind me and to lean into the excitement I feel for the decade ahead.
When I turned 30, someone told me my 30s would be the best decade. I often think about that because my 30s did turn out to be monumental. It wasn’t the best decade in the way this person meant. But, at the same time, it kinda was.
Before the first year of my 30s was halfway over, an event I now think of as “the Big Bang” knocked the ground from beneath me in ways I never saw coming. My 30s were a decade of great pain, but it was a strange sort of pain. I look back on it, and, honestly, it seems glorious. It was the sort of pain that brings change, transformation, liberation.
It was a portal. A Doorway of No Return—right on time as my First Act ended and the Second began. And what an Adventure World I entered.
It was a character arc.
It changed me, utterly. I grew up. I moved beyond narrow constrictions and definitions that I had thought were mine, but that were not. I stripped myself down to the very core—down to the shadows, down to the emptiness—and then out into unfathomable vastness, into the raw and unbearable glory that is life itself. I got to choose life in a way not everyone does.
It was a decade in which I moved three times, bought my first house, focused on healing, fell down more times than I can count, and rose and rose again.
It was a decade in which I came to understand Story on a deeper level than I ever had before.
Photography by Mackenzie Westphal.
As I stand here at this threshold between decades, I wanted to mark the moment with something a little lighter and more personal—a celebration, not just of my biggest lessons and transformations, but of the small, quirky, human things that make up the texture of my life. So, in honor of turning 40, here are 40 things you might not know about me. Some are serious, some are silly, all are pieces of the story that’s brought me here and the one still unfolding.
40 Things You Might Not Know About Me
1. I’m passionate about health and biohacking. Over the years, I’ve learned how much my creativity depends on my body’s energy and balance. I love exploring ways to support that, including eating as clean as possible, staying active, practicing yoga, minimizing toxins, and generally treating my body like an ally in the creative process. For me, it’s not about perfection, but rather curiosity and stewardship. I’m always seeking how to better live in harmony with the systems that sustain me. I’ve learned that creativity is life force, and as such it has to be cultivated, which very often looks like cultivating your health. It has to be honored and approached with reverence rather than control. It has to be listened to rather than dictated to.
2. My favorite “cheat” meal is mac and cheese. (My nieces and nephews even call me “Aunt Mac.”)
3. For guilty-pleasure movies, I always go back to Golden Hollywood. It’s what I grew up watching. So much good storytelling in those years, and I also just love the lightheartedness in so much of it. There’s a wholesomeness to it I really love. It always feels like home when I go back to old movies like Stagecoach and It’s a Wonderful Life, Bette Davis, Humphrey Bogart, Errol Flynn.
4. A belief I held that once protected me but eventually limited me was that my life was meant to follow someone else’s map. For a long time, that belief made me feel safe—until I realized the path I was on was leading me away from myself. The day I started charting my own course was the day my story truly began.
5. I cannot stand bananas.
6. My morning routine always includes skincare, meditation, and baked eggs for breakfast.
7. My theme song is “Eye of the Tiger.” (My dad started calling me a “tiger” before I was born. I still own the stuffed tiger in a little T-shirt says “I ♥ Katie” that he bought me when I was a newborn in the hospital.)
8. I was homeschooled in a small town in western Nebraska in the middle of nowhere. I owned two horses, and the highlight of my year was spending time on a friend’s cattle ranch in Wyoming every summer.
9. I started writing as a way to “not forget” the stories I would tell myself. My first writing gig was a family newsletter that eventually became Horse Tails with a subscribership of 30 people—of which I was very proud. I produced it for five years until I finished high school and started focusing on novels.
10. I’m secretly really good at swearing like a sailor (in three languages).
11. My coffee ritual: Chemex pour-over, dark-roast decaf, organic and water processed, with just enough cream to cover the bottom of the mug.
12. My favorite part of storytelling is the part before I even start writing it. I love to be in the daydreaming and the imagining. My second favorite part is outlining when I’m just having a conversation with myself longhand in a notebook.
13. I can’t start writing until I have some kind of food to ground me. I default to a cup of coffee. Music has always been key as well. In the past, I would listen to my soundtracks alphabetically because I liked that sometimes I would get weird contrasts—like when I’d be writing a love scene to Gladiator, or I’d be trying to write a battle to something really soft and contemplative like Cider House Rules. Sometimes, it totally didn’t work, but sometimes it would help me find interesting juxtapositions and emotions. Nowadays, I’m much more moody and spend way too much time trying to find exactly the right thing.
14. When I was twenty, I was in an ATV accident that cracked my skull. Just a few weeks before turning forty, I totaled my vehicle in another car accident. In both cases, I (more or less) walked away. Those moments remind me how fragile and miraculous life is. They made me more conscious of my health, my body, and the sheer gift of getting to keep living this story—as well as the sense that there’s a reason I’m still here and a purpose in each day I get to keep living.
15. My biggest ongoing life lesson is boundaries—learning not to front-load them from avoidance, but to work with them holistically in relationships. Telling people no.
16. I once tried to learn to bowl just to beat a boy at a bowling contest. I practiced for months and still mostly threw gutter balls, though weirdly I’d often get a strike on my very first try and never again after that.
17. The quality I most admire in people is authenticity. It’s that capacity to be deeply in touch with your own truth and your own wholeness—and also a sense of what is broken and perhaps blind. It’s the cohesiveness of self that allows you to stand fearlessly in who you are. It’s not to say you never admit you’re wrong or never change, but there is a deep sense of truth about where you exist on your own cutting edge at any moment. I would say that is something I admire because it’s such a core quest for myself.
18. I believe love is a state of being. It’s a frequency, a vibrational force. It’s not a feeling per se, although we do feel it. I believe most of what people say love is are just emergents from what love really is. To me, love is the same vibration as health, the same vibration as truth, the same vibration as beauty. When you’re “in” love, the world is right. There’s an alignment to who you are and how you move through life. You are whole; you are fulfilled. Love isn’t something you give or take. It’s like being in a swimming pool: love is the water that surrounds you. Being “in” love is a matter of bringing yourself into that vibration. You can literally learn how to flip the switch.
19. My favorite household ritual is going around the house first thing in the morning and opening all the curtains to see what the day is like.
20. My happy place is hanging out with my nieces and nephews.
21. The place that changed me most was probably Missouri. I lived there for three years. They were really hard years, but I learned and discovered so much about myself. They were really great years, too.
22. The timeline of my life has never matched what has been taught as normal. I’ve hit some milestones early, and others I hit late or have yet to hit. I’ve had to learn to surrender to the idea of “trusting the tide I came in on”—that I was born at the right moment for everything I’m meant to do in this life and that I have to trust the process, have patience with the profound amount of transformation I have embraced in this lifetime, and to acknowledge that while this creates a great deal of speed in some areas, in others it requires a great deal of slowness. I’m allowing my story to be what it is instead of insisting it has to be something else. There is a profound amount of freedom available in that discovery.
Photography by Mackenzie Westphal.
23. I always write with a black pen.
24. My ideal day off looks like taking a day off to just binge-watch something all day long. I don’t watch a lot of TV and movies every day anymore, but I take a day once a month to just binge-watch something.
25. I’d rather be a stand for something rather than against something. I’ve seen so clearly throughout my life that what we resist persists. On a personal level, I have always felt it was never enough for me to move away from things that weren’t working; I always needed to have something I could move toward.
26. One of the guiding principles of my life has been that old proverb that “if you want to change the world, change your country, if you want to change your country, change your city, if you want to change your city, change your family, if you want to change your family, change yourself.” It all starts at home. It all starts within.
27. I also believe even the smallest acts of integrity within oneself (even if they’re happening behind closed doors in your house and no one ever sees or knows what you have chosen, worked through, and overcome) have a ripple effect. Most of the pain in the world comes from a feeling of separation—of turning something or someone into the Other that must be defeated or fought against. Recognizing that starts within, because there are so many parts of ourselves we try to make Other—that we’re ashamed of or that we vilify or put into the shadow. I believe the most important work we can do is the work of the self.
28. I love the idea of inner callings—that we come into this life with certain things we are meant to fulfill, that some part of us already knows. To me, that offers a great deal of meaning and purpose, even when things are hard or don’t make sense. There’s always a lesson, always a teacher, always something for my good that’s meant to help me do what I’m here to do.
29. I believe life is ultimately about learning to come into integrity and wholeness within oneself, to bring back and heal and integrate the pieces that sometimes are shattered or lost. Inherent to that is the quest for each of us of learning to listen to who we are, to know what is true for us, and to gain more and more capacity to stand in that integrity. The only thing any one of us is asked to do in this life is to be true. I think we can get very easily distracted from that—not least because sometimes, the thing we think is the truest for us is really the loudest ego projection in our lives. For me, there’s this tremendous mandate to not just try to overcome my blind spots, but to accept with humility that I have them—and that, by their very definition, I don’t know what they are. I don’t think that should undermine confidence or conviction. But I do think it merits a tremendous amount of humility and a great deal of self-introspection.
30. I’ve often defined my own success only in retrospect. I’ve reached certain marks and realized that by certain people’s definitions, these markers would be defined as successes—whether it’s podcast downloads or books sold or making a living as a writer or winning some award or having a certain number followers on social media. All of that’s great, and I’ve always appreciated it. But I’ve never chased it. I’ve never really felt comfortable chasing end goals. I’m much more interested in being curious and playing and focusing on the job at hand. My goals are more about “I’m going to do this today” or “I’m going to put this book out this year.” I don’t much like being in the space or energy of worrying too much about how well things will do. I just do my best and put it out there.
31. I’ve dealt with imposter syndrome my entire career. I have faced it by looking it in the eye and being very clear about who I am, what I’m doing, and why I’m doing it. Sometimes that clarity might be about “how much money do I have to make to be a success?” or “how many books do I have to sell?” But it’s also asking, “Am I doing what I love? Am I being authentic? Am I showing up in a way I’m proud of? Am I making an impact? Am I putting something good into the world?” That’s not to say I don’t define my success by material things, because I totally do. If all of a sudden, I made zero dollars tomorrow and sold zero books, I would obviously face some pretty big ego deaths and fears. But here’s what I come back to all the time: I used to say about writing fiction that even if no one ever read what I wrote, I’d still do it. To me, I think that’s the definition of success. Is what I’m doing something I would do no matter what? Is it something I would move heaven and earth to do?
32. I name all the important trees in my life. Right now, I’m making friends with Mr. and Mrs. Maple, the Owl Tree, and the Sentinel.
33. My Myers-Briggs type is INTJ. My Human Design profile is a 6/2 Generator with emotional authority. My Enneagram type is a 3 (tritype is 351). Scorpio Sun, Scorpio Rising, Libra Moon.
34. I’m slightly paranoid about fire and sometimes have to go around and double-check that outlets aren’t hot.
35. When I was younger, I didn’t have a place for emotions in my life. I didn’t understand how sensitive and emotional I was, and I didn’t really learn how to cry until life cracked me open at 30. But life has been so much richer with emotion. It’s more difficult, but so much more dimensional too.
36. The character I relate to most from my own books is 100% Allara from Dreamlander. I didn’t intend her to basically be me, but in a lot of ways she was. IYKYK.
37. My favorite movie is The Great Escape. But the story that changed my life was Lord of the Rings.
38. To me, story is a primal force. I often speak of story in the singular. It’s capital-S Story. It’s an archetypal force. The more I study it, I just see it everywhere. And I don’t know if story itself is the reflection or if story is what everything else is reflecting. For me, story is a map. It’s the cartography of the cosmos. There is so much more there than we understand. Story is so much more of an initiatory force than we acknowledge most of the time. In my life, when I have gone through my hardest moments, it is story that has saved me. And I don’t mean specific stories, although they’ve played a role, but story itself and my own capacity to recognize it as this archetypal, immutable force in the world and in my life.
39. What I wish I could tell my younger self… I always think of the line from the movie The Kid (which has always been a meaningful movie to me, but especially now that I’m turning 40, which is what the story is about). In the film, someone is asked that same thing, and she responds, “I’d say, baby… it’s gonna be fine.”
What I’d tell my younger self is:
“It’s all going to work out.
I’ve got you.
All the things you think can never happen in your life—all the doors that you think are closed—they’re not.
By the time you get to 40, you’re going to have walked through almost all of those doors, and you’re going to be a version of yourself you will be so proud of.
So just hang on.
Keep doing what you’re doing.
Keep showing up.
Be honest.
Trust yourself.
Let yourself cry.
And, above all, keep listening to the stories.
Keep telling stories.”
40. The best thing about turning 40 is that it doesn’t feel like the beginning of the end. It feels like the beginning of the beginning. It feels like I am at the threshold of all the most important things that will happen in my life. I feel wide open to what it is I’m really here to do and to say—full of vitality and excitement and anticipation and gratitude for all that has been and for all that I know will be.
Photography by Mackenzie Westphal.
Click the “Play” button to Listen to Audio Version (or subscribe to the Helping Writers Become Authors podcast in Apple Podcast, Amazon Music, or Spotify).
___
Love Helping Writers Become Authors? You can now become a patron. (Huge thanks to those of you who are already part of my Patreon family!)
Why We Need Heroic Stories: The Courage We Borrow From Fiction
The Four Seasons of Writing: How Authors Can Build a Burnout-Free Writing Routine
Thoughts on How the Marketplace Is Shaping the Stories We Tell
The Emotional Toll on Writers in the Modern Landscape (And Why So Many Are Burning Out)
About K.M. Weiland | @KMWeiland
Enjoyed that. Thanks for sharing. I can only write using a black pen also.
Well, Kate, I’m a lot older than you. Every decade brings about similar thoughts. You are just at the beginning and have a lot to look forward to. I’m now nearer the end and am looking back at my achievements, hoping I’ve left a positive mark on the world.
I loved reading your thoughts. Such wise words.
Happy birthday, Katie! Thank you for sharing these beautiful insights, and for sharing more about yourself. I’m especially interested in #4 (the limiting idea that your life “was meant to follow someone else’s map”) and I look forward to hearing more about that if you ever choose to share it. After listening to so many of your podcast episodes, it’s nice to get to know you better. Thank you for everything you do!
First of all, happy birthday! I hope you have the BEST day.
Thank you for everything you’ve done for authors like me. You’ve made me a better writer and I’m grateful to you for that.
Also, thank you for sharing me this post and giving an insight into your life. It’s very clear that story is a large part of your life. And I, too really love the Great Escape. Steve McQueen is my favorite actor.
Those pictures look amazing!
Here’s to a new beginning for you. 🙂
A very happy birthday to you, Ms. Weiland! (Yay for homeschooled kids! 😉) This post really reveals your wisdom, not just about writing, but also about life and mindset. We don’t have all the answers, but it’s important to remember the ones we do have.
My Best Regards,
Journey Bloomfield
Happy Birthday! Your reflective post triggered some memories from my life. Some made me smile. Others were not so pleasant. But, as I approach my 84th birthday, looking back on my character arcs as I approach the climax, I am satisfied with the story. What more can one ask for?
Happy Birthday! I enjoyed reading your reflections on your life.
Welcome to your 40s! I’ve definitely enjoyed it here in mine. I hope you do know that you’re making a positive impact with your work. I’m so grateful for all I’ve learned from you that’s helped me grow as a writer. Without this website and Structuring Your Novel, I’m not sure I would have ever completed a book, much less having confidently gotten started on another one. Thank you and happy birthday!
I have almost 32 years on you, but despite whatever wisdom that may or may not mean, I appreciate these forty tidbits of YOU. Many of these resonate with me, but Number 25 really takes the cake: “what we resist persists.” Being vocally and actively AGAINST something gives that “something” more attention than one intends; negativity showers attention on it. It’s the difference between a positive outlook and a negative one. We catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
Happy Birthday and thanks for this post! I’ve followed you for a long time and I’ve never met you but it was strange reading your post today. I am male and couple years ahead of you but I too score as an INTJ but 1 on Enneagram and I feel like you were describing me throughout this post! Not the specific experiences, but what you shared and how your shared hit close to home for me. Thanks again for this post and I look forward to many more!
Another INTJ here. I still remember what a relief it was to discover that “label” because it was a kind of validation.
I see a lot of myself in you, except for the banana-thing. Must be our Midwest upbringing. I like your attitude. Best wishes for a great birthday.
Happy birthday and thank you!
Happy Birthday, Katie! Thank you for these powerful reflections. You are wise beyond your years.
Happy Birthday!! You have led such an accomplished, but very private life. Still, there have been glimpses that made me wonder over the years if you’ve experienced a similar trajectory as my own. The expression of how we live life is very different, but there is an underlying current through most of your experiences that you speak of that I’ve felt I’ve navigated as well. As someone else who absolutely appreciates the raw authenticity of people- the bravery, audacity, and compelling life force to just be you, I believe our legacy is not something physical we leave behind but in the story maps we create of how choices are made and then experienced or lived. It’s the expression of the possibility of what could be and an option for how to be. It’s opening others to what’s possible for them. Your legacy is so rich, and we are so lucky to have had the opportunity to have witnessed what you have allowed us to see and share in. I’m on the cusp of celebrating my 50th birthday in a couple months, and for the first time, I’m thinking about it in terms of a decade of meaning. It’s very aligned with how you’re approaching your 40’s. My 40’s were how you described your 30’s. And my 30’s were how you describe your 20’s. And even though there has been great pain in my trajectory, there has also been immense joy and bravery. It’s odd to say you wouldn’t change anything, but when you reach the point of gratitude and trust and not wanting to be anything but who you’ve become, it’s freedom. It’s the deepest form of love. Which, by how you define love, validates, to me, that our common definition of love is just too limited. It’s too small and controlled. Which is also so human of us to do. Until we are ready to see it differently, more expansively. Your list has given me a lot to think about today. Thank you for the gift of being you and sharing your wisdom with us. I’m so curious to see what you share with us during this upcoming decade, because I feel like the energy will be a mirror to my own born through a different expression. Happy, happy birthday!! Wishing you a beautiful decade.
Katie, you had made such a positive impact on my life. Thank you all you have done! May GOD bless you in every area if you life!
I love your list of 40 things I did not know about you. Great idea and good things. I have many of the same things as you, such as hating bananas, but I still eat them sometimes, because like you, I am also a health fanatic. I like to eat everything healthy. I reside in Japan (as an American outsider) and just wrote a book about Japanese cuisine that I m querying about now. There are lots of weird foods here that are so healthy that I have to eat them. delicious too like tarako or cod roe (fish eggs). At age 40. You look so much younger in your photos. My only child ws born when I had recently turned 40 , so it was a busy, but good decade for me. I love your books on writing story. I need to reread them all. They have been so helpful to me. Please keep writing such books. cheers, Laurel Kamada
Happy Birthday and thank you for all the work you put in to help others.
I adore your wealth of knowledge, your openness, and simply you. You always inspire me, and truly pick me out of the doldrums with your wit and wisdom. Truly. When asked that fateful question, if you had the chance to sit down for a dinner chat with any four people, from all walks of life, you have always been at the head of the table for me. Simply because of your truth, your insights, your humor, and just how genuine you are. And now, I feel that dinner has come and I thank you for such a wonderful post… and to you, I wish the happiest of birthdays, today and always. I hope all everywhere, one day, finds the time to write to heal and to explore themselves… and one day as well, finds your blog that truly is a well of it all.
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday, self knowledge can be hard won at times, it sounds like you are in a great place. Cheers
Your beautiful reveal is a gift to all of us who surround you with love and support, and who feast on just about everything you say and write. Thank you, Katie, and happy birthday. If we think about it, every day is a birth day and a new opportunity for each of us to blossom and grow, and your list is a great reminder to all of us to honor nature and ourselves and our fragile, precious world.
Happy Birthday! Enjoyed your list. Thanks for sharing.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KATIE!! and many more…
I have to tell you, those years in your forties are the BEST. Fifties are good too. You have some great times ahead. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday and thank you for sharing. It was a wonderful and inspiring read. Brilliant!
The best definition of love I have ever heard was from the TV series Kung Fu. Love is harmony, even when there is discord.
You don’t like *bananas*?
That’s it, I can no longer read your writing advice.
(I eat maybe one banana a year on average🤣)
Oh what a beautiful reflection! Congratulations on turning 40! This post cracked me up in some ways — I, too, despise bananas! Whenever I see something flavored strawberry-banana I always think, “they’ve desecrated the strawberries.” My favorite scene in “Escape from Planet of the Apes” is the part where Zira snaps, “I *loathe* bananas!”
My niece and nephews don’t call me “Aunt Mac,” but they do come over for holiday feasts specifically for my mac & cheese. *Whispers* it’s Martha Stewart’s Perfect Mac & Cheese *whispers*. I love that my oldest nephew vows to come back home from college just to eat it.
When we entered 2020, I was hoping to see some styles from the Roaring 20s come back. Like you, I love old movies. Not just for the storytelling, but because of the gorgeous clothes and architectural details in the homes. There was so much beauty back then that was just commonplace, but we’ve lost it all to boring beiges and brutalism. What I love about your blog is that it helps facilitate beauty in storytelling, which I can’t thank you enough for doing.
Like you, I’m a November-born INTJ, but my health isn’t where it should be. I’m trying to get healthier. I’m trying to cultivate better habits. You’re doing wonderfully, and it’s inspiring to see how well you’re doing. In my youth, I also attempted to follow someone else’s map. I’ve been annoyed with myself for taking so long to realize I need to throw away that map and chart my own course. Thank you for letting me see I should forgive myself, and move on.
Have a beautiful, blessed day. May you live long and prosper! God bless you!
This was so wonderful to read, I absolutely cried as I read your list. Not only beautiful but a LOT, practically everything if I’m being honest, echoes my own journey, my own beliefs & how I view the world & it just touched me & makes me so grateful I stumbled across your blog many years ago. In fact, you’ve inspired me to include 31 things about me here, it was a lot tougher than expected & I omitted anything that would have been repeating what you spoke about. Feel free to read or ignore:
1. Aquarius sun, Pisces moon, Sagittarius rising, Scorpio north node, Aries Lilith & Virgo Chiron
2. I like to tailor the journal(s) I use to outline a story based on the feel of the story – that can manifest as a specific color or pattern I associate with it, an animal or a specific style of notebook.
3. I can make this strange purring sound in the back of my throat unlike how other people can do it & to this day I still have no idea how I can do it.
4. The teacher that impacted my life the most had little to do with the subject matter & everything to do with his actions to defend me revealing to me I actually deserved respect & the way people bullied me wasn’t normal or deserved. I actually thought he didn’t much like or notice me, I now don’t believe that but also maybe that added to the importance of his actions for younger me. No adult before or after that day ever stood up for me the way he did & he’s become a model for my own self-love journey & how to pay it forward.
5. I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve had alcohol in my life. And even less (i.e. none) for other substances.
6. I’m terrified of spiders but for that reason I’m grateful they exist because every time I have to deal with one, I’m overcoming a fear. Haven’t reached that place with millipedes yet tho….
7. While it triggers immense fear responses & takes multiple rounds of emotional/energetic purging, healing, centering & validating my feelings after the fact, there’s no feeling greater than when I actually say exactly what is in my heart to say, in the moment, especially to advocate for myself or call out B.S.
8. I once spent an entire meditation session having a laughing fit because I was releasing the internalized pressure to be perfect, I felt laughter bubble up & it resulted in recognizing that this isn’t how meditations “should” be done & every time I thought that, it made me laugh harder. It was one of my best meditations to this day (and I meditate every day)
9. Years ago I challenged myself to a 100-day meditation practice & I haven’t stopped yet.
10. Some people write affirmations on sticky notes for themselves, years ago I started making some in the form of artwork on blank index cards, some white, some color. I put three up on a blank wall in my room – now I have over 100 mini artworks affirming valuable lessons I’ve learned in multicolor splendor splashed over my walls. I treat them as oracle cards, paying attention to if I’m ever lost in thought over something, & I find myself staring at one as I muse, I take as a message/reminder. It always works.
11. I have the entire rap for the “Wild Wild West” theme perfectly mastered.
12. [Spoiler for Santa Claus 😉 ] When I was a kid & found out Santa was just my parents leaving presents the night before, I waited until next Christmas, secretly bought myself my own toy, forged my dad’s handwriting (he’d written me a letter “from” Santa before) to leave a note from Santa & hid the gift in the back. That Christmas I waited until after the other gifts were opened & “discovered” this mystery toy, my parents were stunned & the magic might have lasted longer but I pretty quickly started laughing & confessed.
13. Strangely, I too have a paranoia about fire & am quite similar in my preoccupation with outlets and the like!!!
14. My self-love journey is in no small way connected to the Winter Soldier in the MCU (semi-spoilers: I realized if I felt such empathy for him & a desire for him to know peace & forgive himself, why couldn’t I do that for myself?)
15. Tangentially, I study multiple languages for funsies, including Romanian, Russian, Gaelic, Danish & German. As a result of my casual studies, I can find myself thinking in multiple languages at once or trying to speak Romanian but it comes out German, and then suddenly the French I learned in school pops up in my brain!!!
16. I’ve had premonitory visions & dreams since I was a child & can still remember the 1st time it happened.
17. The Great Escape is one of my favorite movies as well & I feel much more at home in the 50s & 60s films too, but I’d add in some films that have shaped me in unexpected ways/saved my life/sanity are Heathers, Practical Magic, The Phantom of the Opera (which, I’m not sorry, I prefer the musical film version to the stage version & I don’t care if I’m alone on that hill)
18. I don’t care how many times I say it or hear it, that line “I don’t KNOW, Margo!” from Christmas Vacation always makes me laugh
19. I curate playlists based on a type of healing I need at the moment: connecting to my inner child, honoring my Free Spirit, reclaiming my power, reminding myself of my worth, etc – I put it on & it’s like a little spell I cast without any extra effort.
20. My late cat used to fear the sound of the ice cream truck music & to this day I catch myself equally disturbed when I hear the music rolling through my street.
21. As a child, I once kept a spoon on my nose for an entire meal at a restaurant – the mayor was at the next table over.
22. I once spontaneously led a group Thriller dance when the song came on at a party. It was as excellent as it sounds.
23. I’ve not yet gotten my driver’s licence but when I have practiced driving my style & demeanor can be best compared to Grace Kelly in To Catch A Thief (the person in the passenger seat is far more afraid than I’ve ever been!)
24. Some people innocently mistake one word for another, as a kid, I innocently used a very not innocent word, thinking it was something else… very loudly, in a very high brow restaurant. Perhaps more troubling: no one seemed to react….
25. I make up songs about my favorite meals I cook & sing them gleefully without shame.
26. I’m such a heavy sleeper at times I’ve woken up with my hair tied up in a bun with no memory of getting up to do it.
27. Back to spiders, if they’re small enough to not trigger fear and/or are in a place that’s not in my way, I’ll leave them in the house & name them. Longest roommate was one under my sink named Dwayne. I almost miss him.
28. My first exposure to true Shakespearean language was in 4th grade & it was love at first soliloquy.
29. Once I have enough of a junk food, I never touch it again – haven’t had Whoppers since elementary school after overdoing it & I quit sodas cold turkey in high school (with the worst hangover that I coped with by having a huge bowl of ice cream). Never desired another fountain drink again.
30. I’ve experienced some type of chronic pain in just about every area of my body – which resulted in a profound journey of self-love, compassion, and respect for my body. Most days now the pains are manageable if not gone.
31. Even though I’ve had quite a lot of experience and mastery in my writing & art, I almost always feel as though I am just discovering their worlds. While it may frustrate my ego, it fills me with wonder, awe & inspiration to know no matter how far along I am on my journey, there’s always another level of awareness that makes it brand new all over again.
Wow. Ok, I totally understand if no one reads this, but it was a lot of fun & I just wanted to share in the fun facts. Sometimes it’s nice to be reminded you’re not alone with your quirks or how you see the world & since your list, K.M., resonated so much with my own path, I’d thought I’d join in. Happy 40th!!
Happy birthday.
Happy birthday, Katie! As someone with exactly two decades on you, I can say with absolute confidence that your best years can still be ahead of you. Sounds like you are on the right path to realizing that. Appreciate you.
Happy birthday, Katie! Wishing you a totally awesome day!
Thank you for sharing your “40 Things” post. It’s nice to get to know you a little. Your thoughts are so profound, there are several I’ll be mulling over for some time to come. I appreciate your candour and your great generosity of spirit.
Thank you for everything you’ve done for authors everywhere. You’ve certainly made me a better writer, and you have my utmost gratitude for that.
Enjoy your day!
Hey Katie—first off, HBD, kid, and thanks for all your guidance over the years. Secondly, I love the new pics, especially your cover photo. Really nicely done. As a fellow INTJ, I can relate to many of your reflections. The Hobbit changed me, and The Thin Man is my go-to when I’m feeling nostalgic. (Love that Nick and Nora banter.) And (having celebrated many more birthdays than you), what I would tell my younger self is this: Slow down, take your time, and yes, smell the roses. Life is good, and much like love, it is indeed a state of being, a state of higher vibration. Thanks for sprinkling some star dust, birthday girl. Great article.
Wishing you so much joy in the decades ahead, Katie. It shocked me to read that you’re turning 40. 40??? Only 40?? Not possible, I found myself thinking, slack-jawed. Look at all she’s done. Look at all the novels she’s written. Look at her vast volume of incredibly rich and superbly wise work on story structure. Look at how much she produces every week … new posts, new podcasts, new …. everything. You have certainly given me a lifetime of incredible wisdom and insight to follow on my own journey, as a writer and a woman. Then of course I see your photos and think … 40? She doesn’t look as if she could possibly be 40. Let’s just say you appear to defy time itself. Wishing you blessings in abundance in your forwarding, and much magic always! 💜💜💜
Happy big 4-0! Take it from someone who turned 40 twenty-four years ago. There is still a lot in life to enjoy.
I hope you had a wonderful birthday. Thank you for sharing all of this. Taking the time to check in with ourselves, see where we are, who we are, all through our lives, enriches the journey.
Katie, this is an excellent piece.
Next year I will be 80. Every year of my life has been fascinating. Looking back, I’ve survived one war, a bad first marriage, a happy second marriage, a close call with cancer, a loss of people in my life, from fellow soldiers, friends, to family members … and the love of my life. I had a career I loved in the private sector. My wife and I raised a daughter long after our sons left the nest. We considered her God’s gift to us. As I approach the final curtain of life, I can say without a doubt, it was never boring. Life offers everyone so many possibilities.
Happy birthday, young lady.
Happy 40th! Hope it’s a wonderful year (decade!) for you. Your post was beautiful, and so much of what you said resonated with me personally. I’ll mention a few things: one, I understand your concerns about hot outlets. My insurance company gave me a free year’s subscription for a Ting Electricity Monitor (I’m sure there are other brands as well), and it’s given me more peace of mind about potential wiring issues. Two, I love that you name your favorite trees. I haven’t done that, but I have favorites, and I’ll miss the trees in my yard more than my house when I move in the next year or so. Three, I’m sorry you went through such a trying time in your 30s, but it’s wonderful that you can see how much it offered you. I faced some very difficult years over the past decade, and now that I’ve come through most of the related challenges, I’m beginning to see the experience as a life-changing gift. I wish you continued (but hopefully gentle!) growth in the coming years. Thanks for sharing!
Happy Birthday Katie:
You’ve got a lot of happy and successful life ahead of you.
Your books have given me a lot of education and inspiration.
Many thanks;
Ralph
Happy birthday, Katie! I think I started reading your blog ten years ago… while there was a gap for a few years (I had a life crisis a couple years ago and couldn’t write, but I’ve since come back to it), I’m so glad I started reading again two years ago. You’ve helped me so much over the years. You teach story structure in a way I can understand (other ways I’ve seen just didn’t click for me).
I’m dying to know: what languages can you swear in?!? Mine are English and Russian. (For the record, I speak Russian fluently, not just swearing. LOL.)
Happy Birtday!!!
You say it’s your birthday? It’s my birthday too! Happy Birthday! Thanks for sharing all of these personal tidbits. I used to be a writer and I think, one day, I’ll be a writer again. I have enjoyed your books! =)
Happy 40th birthday! I turned 40 a couple of months ago. I am still in a place of personal reflection of not only my past decade, but where I want to be in the next decade.
Happy Birthday, Katie!
Nice reflective piece. I appreciate your passion and what you do. You’ve given me direction and a clarity in my own writing. Most of all, thank you for sharing a piece of you. We can see a bit of the special person you are. Thanks again…teacher.
Warm Regards,
Tom
Happy 40th birthday, KM! Your podcast has been an incredible resource and inspiration over the years as I’ve pursued my own writing journey. As a budding astrology student, I was fascinated/surprised to hear that you’re a double-Scorpio(!) and age 40 astrologically is a very important/busy time of evolution because your three mid-life transits are coming up. As a heavily Pluto person myself, the first of these (Pluto Square Pluto) is the big, transformative one I always feel curious about when I hear someone is around this age.
Since you’re the same age as my sister, I know your Pluto must be around 6 or 7 degrees of Scorpio, meaning it’s in your 12th or 1st House since you’re a Scorpio Rising. If so, that means your Pluto Square Pluto is going to be *really* big and impactful for you, as what is going to be put through the big transformation is you, yourself (especially if your Pluto is close to/conjunct your Ascendent). Mine was the same and even though those 2.5 years of my Pluto Sq Pluto were tumultuous and difficult in many ways, I really did come out WAY better and transformed on the other wide, having been put to the test about everything about myself and being able to learn/choose what is most important to me/how I wanted to spend my life and who I really wanted to be. Wishing you a great and wondrous transformation too (I have no doubt you’ll come out even more focused and powerful on the other side of it, as you’ve already done so much work/healing on yourself, which is what Pluto wants). Best of all wishes to you for the best of all outcomes during this powerful time!
Dearest Ms Weiland,
Happiest birthday to you.
May God bless you with good things and good health, always. Also always, may you easily find resolution for all your troubles and what ails you.
Have a wonderful birthday and a great 40th year ahead.
Enjoy your day.
From Ida, in Malaysia.
A beautiful post. Thanks for sharing and happy birthday!
This is a beautiful list of reflections (including the lighter ones about naming the trees). Happy birthday! May you grow a lot in your 40s 🙂
Happy Birthday, Katie!
Happy 40th. Thank you for such a beautiful post and for all the kind help you’ve given us. Have a wonderful decade Katie!
Happy birthday! Thank you so much for sharing! I just turned 21, and I get it: I feel like I’ve just stepped through a threshold in my life. It was very insightful to read all your words of wisdom; they are all inspiring and thoughtful. It was especially fun to read you’ve spent time in Wyoming, which is where I live, and that you were homeschooled, like I was.
Happy birthday! Thank you so much for spending so much time helping and encouraging writers. Writing and blogging is very solitary and one-sided: just know that it does matter.
Thank you all so much for all your kind words! I was so blessed. 🙂
I love reading your blog and reference it often in my weekly roundup. I have been reading you for over a decade and you have been astonishing! I cannot believe that you are only turning 40. Your wisdom and knowledge of story structure feels timeless. As if you were there when the first story was told. Happy Birthday may the next decade be as fufilling as the last.
Happy belated birthday, Katie. Inspirational. Thank you.
Another INTJ here who has followed you for years, really appreciate your personal shares, your wisdom and lovely photos. I’ve been taking a break from writing to pursue my other creative hobby of singing, guitar playing, songwriting but have many of your books on a shelf when the time and motivation returns. It was intriguing to read the many comments, I feel like I’m part of a tribe now. Enjoy the 40s! For me it was a decade of transformation and life has only gotten better over almost 30 additional years.
Happy birthday indeed😀
I just want to thank you for all of your hard work and dedication. I’m new to writing and am learning so much every time I take in a pod cast.
You are definitely worth celebrating so I’ll fire up a batch of Mac n cheese in your honour.
Jeffrey
Happy Birthday!! You have the right idea to celebrate your day.
You have inspired me to do some deep thinking about myself. I could maybe come up with ten things about myself.
I enjoyed my 40’s and I know you will also.
I’m thinking of a line from a poem maybe.
“So what do you plan to do with your one big beautiful life?”
I think you have some things in the works. ☺️
Congratulations on another decade! I remember when you turned 30.
I have been around much in recent years, but I learned so much here, and as I get closer to finishing my novel, I’ve poured myself into the story and characters. I want it to make a difference, something people will remember.
Just the other day, a photographer I follow (who once did family pictures for me) posted a client’s Wicked-themed birthday photo shoot, and the caption included, “I think everyone should get to give themselves a birthday photo shoot!” It looked like so much fun! I love your photos on this page. I hope you had fun with that shoot 😀
I’m not sure “emergents” is the proper word to use in point 18, but that’s me just picking at your poetic usage.